....ehh

I would tell you that you weren't worth it....

But the alcohol wants me to lye...

So I tell you I aint shit....

& that it's OK for you to cry....

Granted that I'm still a shot under par...

I proceed to tales of how beautiful you are....

I'm setting my thoughts in motion....

As if they would move you to my car....

I gotta a charger with no cell...

My fam out on bail.....

& she missing punctuations...

like we missing court dates....

so I end my sentences with dollar signs to make sure my seed straight...

Dotting these eyes with X's & Oh's....

My mixed shawty take it by the whole...

& she ain't my side chick but she the half of my hole...

cause my other girl got a hold...

summer time heat...

but they love so cold....

So remain torn...

I'm just waiting for this seamstress to mend it all....

Then I'll place a call....

To the woman that always made cents....

.....

I lost my friends with my sanity....

Around the same time I relinquished vanity....

When the relations became more physical....

When writing became only a vehicle....

When these rhymes became forced...

When my voice got hoarse....

I'm losing things because it's hurting them less...

To stay....

So after a while...

I just exile...

Myself....

Not having to cut loses...

Because there will never be anything to be gained....

There was less of something then....

& more of nothing now....

Because....

Now I have nothing too lose....

              

It was the most beautiful labyrinth you’ve ever seen.

With twists and turns and mysteries,

It was an enigma in itself.

Didn’t quite know its own wealth or worth…

But it still seemed to keep its composure.

-

At the entrance were firey gates stolen stole strait from the hinges of hell,

And you could see it in its eyes when his pupils swelled,

He was one of a kind-

That couldn’t fathom his self a full house

Because that would mean that that thick, smut covered chain would have to break,

And that rusted lock would have to find a way to contort itself free.

But worst of all,

It would have to find the Key.

Better yet, someone to wield it

So in the meantime,

All he had was his maze like mind.

-

I found myself stumbling upon the land the led to this grand attraction.

A rock road that was apparently way better without the piece of cake.

Oh, this pain? The cherry on top,

But I remained grounded until my eyes feasted upon, arguably, the most

Aesthetically pleasing,

Soul teasing,

Heart pleading

Sight of life.

This was more than a maze,

This was a game.

The only one where it’s not about reaching the end first,

But it’s all about how you play.

-

…

But for now,

I’ll stay outside and stare at the most beautiful labyrinth you’ve ever seen.

With twists and turns and mysteries,

It was an enigma in itself.

Didn’t quite know its own wealth or worth…

But it still seemed to keep its composure.

And that’s what made him different.

Cuenta Atrás

I'm starting at 11:50 and giving myself five

which is more praise than I've ever had...

& I'm losing more days than I ever have.....

Because these metafours leave me

.....twisted three ways till Wednesday

Two bad I lost count on my 25th hour

now this life gets sour, & those hearts get colder

...yet I still one....

So I'm stuck trying to be a hero....

but now....

I'm left....

with...

Cero....

Heartbreak Diary

Its like crying invisible tears
Like no one can see how much it hurts
To just act like nothing ever happened
Its like I'm lost and can't be found
Because no one is searching
Because they don't know I'm missing
They see me but in the mirror, I see nothing
I feel ashamed and weak
Because I will take all the bad
Just to have one smile

Letter to a Childhood Soldier

Dear Soldier,

Your clay has been molding

from foreboding memories, 

your path is unfolding 

before the eyes of your enemies, 

beware the façade. 

Wear what you've taught.

Take all the shots.

Put on your Brave 

and don't be afraid 

to share what you've thought-

How's that gun fit?

Should be just right

because ever since it took the place 

of that gray teddy bear with the missing eye,

you've been holding it tight

and you can't deny that look on your face,

I know you're tired.

I know your feet hurt from marching

I know your heart hurts regarding love from the past,

but I implore you, 

love past that.

Take that mask that you found with your shield

and wield it with caution.
So strap on your boots and shoot until the war is over.

Remember that gray teddy bear with the missing eye

and value your life.

Childhood Soldier.

Mona Lisa

Mystery
Could it be that no one knows who you are
Including yourself
Self
Thats a hard word for you to spell
Because you cant tell me, you for that matter
What it means
Self is the reason that you write that spoken word
To a rhythm no one else heard
Pain is the reason why you want to save the world
You want to live vicariously through their happiness
Cause you gave up on finding your own
The Mona Lisa with no smile
Cause in the picture she was with child

Lost...

Having a gander at these lost moments I've found
Searching for the moment that I lost myself
The ever so clear got me down and out on the Everclear
But a change came
A light came on
The sun rose rather
& I arose in a forest
Stumbling over pebbles in the distance
Running this race......
&.........
My next life precedes me
So either way I'm losing
Lost with my hope
Memories so grand I went broke
But I cant say I didn't have it all
Taking vain of these worldly things
Knowing they'd be charged to the game
Ice Cold Knock to the head for this constant change
Which brings constant pain
Wanting constant gain
Losing my ill gained famed
Having thoughts so strange
I'm just lost in my brain.....

Save Me

I lost myself when I found you
So now what am I supposed to do,
With this heart?
It no longer beats
Cause my mistakes repeat
And " I always fall for your type"
That's why I'm typing this love letter
And trying to make you believe that it will get better
While my eyes get wetter
And your friends saying "forget her"
Just get that cheddar
And my girls saying you like rest
But I always protest
Because your not like them
Your worse

Unfree

I loved it
I would say you
But that wouldn't be true
I loved the thought of you
And when you were actually a reality you lost your flare
You were no longer a trend
Somethings look better inside of the store or street corner where I found
Love
Or that's what I thought
But I think too much
Say to little
Now I can't stand to look at you cause it reminds me
It reminds that I love the thought of you and I think too much.